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2009 Year-end blurbs.

December 23, 2009 // Posted in !Share (Tags: , , , , , , , , ) |  No Comments

Didn’t think I’d still be at this let alone have a selection to pull from.

Quick Rewind: While watching, no, listening to Pat Buchanan during one of the debates, my kidneys were elbowing my jaw for space.

Flour Bumps: I envisioned her feverishly body stirring a cauldron of gumbo on her tippy toes on top of a step ladder, wailing an eye of newt mantra. One fatal slip and I’m telling the reporter the last thing I heard was “bring me more cra…?”

Don’t cha know: A towering 5.2 wannabe hip Londoner, stumbling on stilettos, in an all black ensemble complete with a full length duster sweater to mask her thighs of bovine proportions. She was compensating for her height and weight distribution issues. It worked on paper. The first time I saw her I knew I was in for a treat as she hopped on the ottoman to sit down. Imagine the legendary Edith Massey overseeing your television debut.

000011100011000011000: Their real passions are road blocks, detours and speed bumps. You can never reach your potential unless you’re challenged. Who knew Microsoft was so freakin’ deep? Dealing with Microsoft is like being in a partnership in the fishing industry until you realize you’re the first catch.

Teamwork: “No!” I hastily interrupted. “We’re both gonna fail, but I can afford the hit.”

Googolplex: I equate it to creative inspiration. That one brief moment when human aspiration conjuncts with totality; delirious wonderment erodes barriers of duality and enlightenment step forth…YES!

Round midnight: I was the picture perfect urbane MUNI-muter. 70% The Joker. 22% The Fool. 8% unknown. In total denial of my insignificance, but consciously fashion forward.

Wheel of FortuNe: Having to ask this at a taqueria is insulting. If I wanted 7-11, I’d go to Taco Bell.

Bass clef: Laughter surrounded us as we engaged in a spirited banter. I gallantly defended my right to an education and she constructively suggested I should explore effective time management skills and use the library for what its for and not as my social den.

Third Shock of a Future Wave

December 22, 2009 // Posted in !Vent. (Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ) |  No Comments


Alvin Toffler’s Jungian insights are spot on and I humbly eat my words. My

nanosecond of an attention span LABORED through his books and found them dull

as dishwater, much like the class that made his books a requirement. No pictures,

illustrations, color and boring font. If your going to write about the future, take it

to the next level in publication. I akin to reading his books to the time I was on

court-ordered lock down at the dinner table until I finished my liver. My tactic of

eat and gulp exhausted my non-refillable Kool Aid glass. My desperate pro-vitamin

petition was laughably denied. “You should be.. .blah, blah.” “People in

other…blah, blah.” Any further responses on my part would have been a death

wish, especially nothing tastes as good as skinny feels* or you can send them my

plate. But I digress…

The information era is certainly upon us. There’s more information available at our f

finger tips then warranted. This insatiable need for instantaneous proliferation of

information is fueling the internet and era. However, speed is a dis-service to

information. Sound bites and blurbs are preferred over content. Validity of a story

keeps credible news agencies in check. Broadcast new has sophisticated the pop

up video format and newscaster are cut and pasted on to a streaming smorgasbord

of stocks, quotes, weather, sports scores and lackluster “BREAKING NEWS”. Even

poor, Hermes couldn’t resurrect a “breaking” update back to its relevance when

fear demanded answers during 9/11. The ease of convenience the internet offer is

enticing as it is predacious. Answer to questions are answered by those embolden

enough to elevate them above rhetorical background chattering; however, there’s

a hidden cost for that ease and it’s information– your information. Number 2

couldn’t be more than happier. #’s are irrelevant when cell phones and i.p.

addresses are more intimate. And this ease is a direct assault on what is emerging

to be a coveted commodity: privacy. Passwords, security, phishing, encryption,

spy ware, key loggers and SSL now fuels the paranoia that Microsoft cultivated. I

believe a precedent will be set when there’s a fee to recover your password. At

least this phenomena will remain in the cyber-clouds and not breach our reality like

the bubble. During the mid-90’s, the internet was the new technological

wonder and at a staggering speed of 28k investment firms wanted in. Start ups

with cozy granola leaning and pocket protector efficiency boldly declared the

future is here. The more hits to a website meant more allowance and made

reaching the unattainable attainable. Even the foggy seven by seven. Armed with

oodles of disposable income and egos as vapid as the contents on their websites,

fledgelings C.E.O. C.T.O. C.O.O., C.F.O and C.B.S.O. (why not) plagued various

metropolitan. Locally, landlords reacted with higher rents and the Ellis Act thinly

cloaked shady evictions. Condo became the new SRO and littered the landscape.

Artists were ejected from S.O.M.A. and had to strategically retreat to the East Bay

or Peninsula. When investors realized hits to a website didn’t equal $$$, the mirror

had cracked and the smoked evaporated. An exodus soon followed. Traditional

analyst warned investors to “get out” The internet sector was head towards a grim

course correction. Nasdaq experienced a record 570 point free fall drop and so did

investors’ confidence. Capital dried up! iVillage, Peadpod CDNow and the likes soon

vanished. Uniqueness prove to be the the key to any profitability on the internet.

Being first in search engine results is paramount. And tracking visitors to site is

good marketing, if not invasive. But is it really necessary for that cookie to stay

active on a computer for 10 years? Despite efforts to sure up exposed ports and

secure information much has already been exposed and still recoverable for those

skilled at recovery. As hackers continue to plague the net, passwords need to be

longer, have lower and uppercase characters and symbols. Now when you’ve

entered your user/password incorrectly a number of times your account is either

frozen or you’re opted to enter a series of incoherent letter and symbols for

access. Some password recovery processes involve a confirmation code sent to

an email address. What happens if you can’t access your email account? The

recovery merry-go-round will become more complicated. Complaints will demand an

easier process and a fee is introduced in the terms and agreements blindly agreed

upon. “Click”

*= a Kate Moss original. Who knew?