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Teamwork?

March 27, 2009 // Posted in !Create, !Vent.  |  2 Comments

Only me.What is it good for? Absolutely nothing. That’s been my past and recent experiences. I can count on one hand and break a few finger the amount of successful times I experience the we in teamwork. School was the greatest test. I learned quickly being paired up with the jock/cheerleader. You know the type that blossom in their school years only to crash and burn later. We start off with the best intentions. “We got plenty of time.” “I got practice, etc. but will catch up later.” Finally our first meeting days before our deadline:
“Where did the time go?” We’re gonna have to go off of what you have, cuz I spaced on this.”

“I have nothing.”
“WHAT?” But I’m gonna fail.”
“No!” I hastily interrupted. “We’re both gonna fail, but I can afford the hit.”
I made such inroads with the in-crowd. Then there was that time camping. The same person “threw” their back out AGAIN. Then Dick and Jane, two able bodies couldn’t muster the strength to gather fire wood, watch a dish, etc. Thankfully, I didn’t find out about their handicaps until on the way home. I was too busy destroying my tent and twisting wire to notice their transgressions. The only successful attempt at teamwork was wining my Dell Notebook. We won through Dell’s poorly promoted scavenger hunt in San Francisco. There were eight colors that we were all slated into and you had to be the first in your color group to win. 16 winners total. We came in third overall and first in the black group by scheming answers out of other people and my classic Carl Lewis, sprint across an active Fourth Street Bridge. One of our clues was on the other side of the bridge and a ship had the nerve to want to cross. Mind you, this was the first time I’ve know the bridge to be active. “I don’t think so”, as I hopped over the guard rail blocking cars from entering . Siren’s blaring light flashing. I did run on the sidewalk and not the street. The guard ordered me to stop. Stop? I didn’t hear him. “You’re crazy!” I couldn’t stop. I was running on my toenails fueled off of a real good adrenaline rush. I wasn’t the only one. On the other side, I turn around and see halfway across a contestant in a pink tee-shirt.  He gets a cross. We were breathless, speechless, but laughing hysterically, if such a thing is possible.  Those running that section of the hunt were dumbfounded with us.  The bridge came down and pinkie tore off. I blew a carb coming out the gate and had to trot back. Later, it was discovered my bridge partner worked for Dell and he was disqualified.  His teammate still got to keep his Dell, after numerous cries of foul play from the pink group.

Flash forward to today and I’m plagued with trying to get some help with a few projects I have, while trying to reestablish myself in the “art” community.  I’m worn out with “I’m so busy”.  I suspect they think I’m incapable of doing it myself.   So be it for now.

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March 16, 2009 // Posted in !Vent. (Tags: , , , , , ) |  1 Comment

mms1

myp

Lies. Chicanery. And just plain unfair! Microsoft’s latest marketing slogan mocks more than encouraged. I endured a three hour + tour of restores, registry cleanings, belligerent threats, cooing, prayers and sage burning (not really) for what turned out to be a video codec problem. One would think with all the bombardment of updates and security patches Microsoft spams they’d update codecs. Their real passions are road blocks, detours and speed bumps. You can never reach your potential unless you’re challenged. Who knew Microsoft was so freakin’ deep? Dealing with Microsoft is like being in a partnership in the fishing industry until you realize you’re the first catch. Window 7 is soon to be rammed down our throats while Vistas can’t seem to get off its teething ring. They need to take the operating system back to formula. And their products are woefully humors. PowerPoint is PowerPointless! For the life of me, I still can’t wrap my brain around Office 2007 having compatibility issues with Office 2003. Spare me the Apple rant. I’ve visited their forums and the venom factor is about the same. I see they’re peddling virus/spyware protection now. Looks like the mighty Apple has been juiced and the tiger been pelted. I thought they were untouchable. The whole computer industry is the best nickle and dime racket to day. Ponzi schemes are so pre 9/11.

Don’t cha know!

March 3, 2009 // Posted in !Share (Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ) |  1 Comment

Lezbros

Lezbros

Films: Lezbro: Don’t Cha Know

USA, 2008, 12 Minute Running Time
Genre/Subjects: Gay, Lesbian, Local Filmmakers / Subjects, Music / Music Video
Language: English

DIRECTOR: Melinda Bagatelos, Dara Sklar

Reveals the unique friendship between guys and dykes in a sassy mix of faux anthropology, reality and techno-pop music video.

I was passing Place Pigale and felt beckoned in by the bright lighting. “”They must need me.”
“What’s going on here”, as I winded pass my cherished friends and throngs of autograph seeker.

“Do you want to be in a movie?”
“Me….I don’t know?”

I haven’t seen it and don’t intend to.  I did it to see if it would be a lesser irritating experience than network television.  My first taste of action was Tweek City.  That was the silver screen vehicle for my Oscar lauded debut performance that sizzled on the cutting room floor.  Straight to landfill.   I could have snatched victory out of the jaws of defeat, by spinning it as a record breaking feat but watching it with friends I was silently relieved and felt like this review:

14 out of 43 people found the following comment useful :-
Wast of time., 3 January 2007
Author: uluru-1 from Wisconsin

  • I wasted 90 minutes of my life watching this move, plus $3.50 renting it. My time would of been better spent daydreaming. And now I realize I am wasting even more time writing a review of this disaster of a movie, so my only hope is to give others fair warning that this movie is wasted time, and wasted money. The entire movie was shot in a very armature way, the plot was barely there, and it was a struggle to stay awake from the very boring beginning, to the very boring end. I would have to equate this movie from the acting, the storyline, the plot and the ending with the poorest of films. Advice to anyone considering renting this movie are save your money, save your time

HGTV’s Freestylewas my in for network television.   Run if anyone ask you to be on television.  We filmed a 12 hour day for only 15 minutes on the idiot box.  I was immediately turned off by the endless retake after endless retake.  Stand this way for the camera, move this way for the camera.  Talk to the camera. “Talk to the camera?” I’m more of the stage variety.  There are no retakes on stage.  If you mess up, be good enough to fool the audience in to thinking that was suppose to happen.  Ms. Glover wore us out with that and my all time favorite: ” When you walk out on stage, OWN it” and I’d chorus back, “no problem, Ms Glover.”  Television felt so constricted.  I failed to see anything creative.  By 2:15 PM, I wanted them GONE!  My annoyance seared through on the couch.  I had to reach deep and “get her done”.  The production manager wasn’t my cup of tea and suspected she wasn’t the crew’s favorite either.  A towering 5.2 wanna be hip Londoner, stumbling on stilettos, in an all black ensemble complete with a full length duster sweater to mask her thighs of bovine proportions. She was compensating for her height and weight distribution issues. It worked on paper.  The first time I saw her I knew I was in for a treat as she hopped on the ottoman to sit down. Imagine the legendary Edith Massey overseeing your television debut. “Hurry Hines, hurry.” “Move that lamp for the egg man.””Oh, egg man!” She was threaten by my friend to the point of snubbing her out of a lunch; however, I accomplished my main goal of getting my art on television.

After being in front of a video camera three times, I dont’ have the patience needed for filming.  I was nothing more then moving, script regeritating prop, fueled off of energizer batteries to keep things “fresh” after the ninth or so take. I’m ambivalent about the experience but I did learn a few thing, like promoting your website is a no, no. Regardless of how clever the delivery.